2 – The Coca Cola was originally green.

3 – You can make a cow up stairs but not the lower.

4 – American Airlines saved $ S 40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first class.

5 – The percentage of territory in Africa that is wilderness: 28%.

The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%.

6 – The quack of a duck (quack, quack) does not echo and nobody knows why.

7 – Each king of cards represents a great king from history:

- Spades: King David.
- Clubs: Alexander the Great.
- Hearts: Charlemagne.
- Diamonds: Julius Caesar.

8 – Multiplying 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 you get 12,345,678,987,654,321.

9 – If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle, if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died of wounds received in combat, if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

10 – Under the law, interstate highways in the United States requires that one mile in every five is straight. These sections are useful as airstrips in emergencies and war.

11 – The name Jeep comes from the abbreviation of the U.S. military to “General Purpose” Vehicle, or “GP” pronounced in English.

12 – The Pentagon has twice the necessary baths. When built, the law required a dark bathroom and one for whites.

13 – It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

14 – Right-handers on average live nine years longer than lefties.

15 – The average person laughs about 15 times a day (we should improve that.)

16 – Mosquitoes have teeth.

17 – Thomas Alva Edison was afraid of the dark.

18 – Miguel de Cervantes and William Shakespeare are considered the greatest exponents of Spanish and English literature respectively, both died on April 23, 1616 …

19 – It took 22 centuries to calculate the distance between Earth and the Sun (149.4 million km). What if we had known long before someone would have thought 1,000,000,000 multiplied by the height of the pyramid of Cheops at Giza, built 30 centuries before Christ.

20 – The word “cemetery” comes from Greek meaning koimetirion: bedroom.

21 – In ancient England people could not have sex without the consent of the King (unless you were a member of the royal family). When people wanted to have a child should apply for a permit to the monarch, who gave them a plaque to be hung outside his door while relaciones.La board had said “Fornication Under Consent of the King” (FUCK). That is the origin of such famous little word.

22 – During the Civil War, when troops returned to barracks without any casualties, put in a great slate “0 Killed” (zero deaths). From this comes the expression “OK” to say everything is fine.

23 – In the monasteries, while reading the Scriptures in referring to St. Joseph, always said “Pater Putatibus” and simplify “PP.” Thus was born the call “Pepe” to Joseph.

24 – In the New Testament book of Matthew says that “It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than a rich man to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.” The little problem is that St. Jerome, translator of the text, interpreted the word “Kamel” as a camel, when in fact the Greek “Kamel” is one thick rope with which vessels are moored to the docks. Ultimately the meaning of the phrase is the same but what seems more consistent?

25- When the English conquerors arrived in Australia, they were amazed to see some strange animals that gave incredible jumps.
Immediately called a native (indigenous Australians were extremely peaceful) and I tried to ask by signs. Noting that the Indian always said “Kan Chu Ru” adopted the English word “kangaroo” (kangaroo). The linguists determined after meaning, which was very clear, the Indians wanted to say “I do not understand.”

26 – The area known as Mexico’s Yucatan comes from the Spanish conquest when one asked a native as they called there. The Indian said: “Yucatán.” What the Spanish did not know was that he was answering: “I’m not here.”

- “If General Motors had improved as much technology as the computer industry, cars would behave now u $ s 25 to consume one gallon every 1000 miles.”

GM’s response was immediate:
- Certainly, but …

* Would you like your car to stopped twice a day?

* Whenever the divinding lines were repainted on the road you would have to change cars.

* From time to time, in full highway, your car will stop for no apparent reason, and you should accept it, put it back up and continue.

* From time to time, making a move, your car would stop and you should reinstall the engine. In a somewhat surprising way, you also accept it.

* It could not be more than one person at a time in your car, unless you buy “CocheNT.” But then, you should purchase separate seats.

* Apple would manufacture a car would work with solar energy, reliable, five times faster, twice as easy to drive. But one official at 5% of the roads.

* The Macintosh car owners add upgrades to their cars … Microsoft, which would make them slower.

* The lights of the oil, gas and alternator would be replaced by a unique “general error of the car.”

* New seats would force everyone to have the same size ass.

* The airbag system warn “Are you sure?” Before opening.

* In case of accident you would not know what has happened.

The view is that since you began your studies in Computer your level of communicability with the rest of your family has been in recess, as well as your ability to maintain a minimum order on your desk and rest in your room. That is why I decided to take action on the matter and put it on show in the same terms that you use every day to go to us, your family:

Seeing that your operating system allows you to keep your work environment optimized or your storage units, have seen fit to defragment the free space and bring order to your filesystem.

So, I released amount of space on your high-capacity drives (shelves) and removable drives (drawers).
I have enabled, along with your dial-up, a space for your documents, which is your address book and your clipboard, and have left enough space for you to have direct access to your writing and drawing tools.

I have also emptied the trash and restored the visual settings of your walls, eliminating these wallpapers as outdated.

Scanning the rest of the environment, I found some hidden partitions, such as the space between the mattress and box spring.

I recommend you keep the software “eye anatomy” in inaccessible folders to your brothers, who are still minors, if you do not want to suffer the censure of the BSA or failing that, your parents.
Dirty clothes I have tried with a long program and compressed in your removable drives.
I recommend that you update more often your underwear, or you will have a regular Antivirus pass .

Since I know you’ll find some difficulty in adapting to this new order, I have overwritten the table of contents of your units so it will be easier to find what you seek.

Sure you can find a bug, it is the first time I am system administrator. If you find any, let me know and will develop a patch.

Finally, I minimized the general disorder of your closet, I have maximized your area of study and have implemented a conditional loop to limit your resources if you do not keep your environment optimized.

I hope that these changes will improve your performance and not need to overclock your hours of study or the bandwidth limit you in your communications.

Signed: Your mother

PS: Your family misses a normal conversation.

That the pigeons (rats of the air) pooped black shit in white garment and white in black clothing.

I’m not very fond of the umbrella so I just take it out when I see the day with an absolute probability of rain. What annoys me is taken the whole day  my umbrella when there is no rain.

Having to fake a leg injury to keep my pride intact when I’m jogging because an elderly man is passing me.

Trying on clothes in a store and see that fits me perfectly, and then get home, try it in front of the mirror and see how, actually, does not fits me.

Your home view

By the buyer

By the bank

By the appraiser

By the Inland Revenue

“Certainly, there are many reasons for divorce, but the main one, is and will be the wedding.” (Jerry Lewis)

“Money is better than poverty, if only for economic reasons.” (Woody Allen)

“Not only is it easier to enter a poor man in the sky, but also has a much better chance of doing before.” (Jaume Perich)

“Television is the first truly democratic system, the first accessible to everyone and entirely governed by what people want. The terrible thing is what people want.” (Clive Barker)

“An expert is someone who tells you something simpler in a confusing way so that makes you think that confusion is your fault.” (William Castle)

“Who can smile when everything is going wrong is because he has thought a person who to blame.” ( Unknown Author)

“Doctors are who are going better: their successes are out there, and they bury their failures.” (Jacques Tati)