Quick, somebody hand me a violin that only dogs can hear:

Moebius Strippe — Tue, 13 Dec 2005 00:00:00 +0000

Paul Martin, who shall remain nameless, has hurt David Wilkins’s feelings:” “Just think about this. What if one of our best friends criticized you directly and incorrectly almost relentlessly? What if that friend’s agenda was to highlight your perceived flaws while avoiding mentioning your successes? What if that friend demanded respect but offered little in return?” Wilkins asked.I’ll be honest: I’d feel pretty bad.”Then again, my mommy always said that if your best friend doesn’t visit you for thirty years and imposes tariffs on your lumber even when NAFTA tells them not to and doesn’t seem to mind deporting your citizens to be tortured in foreign countries, then maybe they’re not really your friend after all.

Anyone want my old copy of Achtung Baby?

Moebius Strippe — Sat, 30 Apr 2005 00:00:00 +0000

As the band launched into One Bono urged fans to climb up and sing with him. “One love, one life, when it’s one need, in the night,” Bono cried out. “This audience, this generation, has had enough. Enough! Enough of despair! No more! So Paul Martin, I’m calling you!”"I can’t even mock this, for so perfectly does it embody the Platonic ideal of self-parody that anything further I could say or write would only serve to dilute it. Truly. Even the doe-eyed actors in Team America weren’t such sycophants. Or such puppets.

In other words

Moebius Strippe — Fri, 31 Dec 2004 00:00:00 +0000

The US’ ban on Canadian beef had nothing to do with mad cow disease, after all.

Home and native land by the dawn’s early light

Moebius Strippe — Mon, 18 Oct 2004 00:00:00 +0000

I wanted to comment on Diana Moon’s evisceration of a particularly egregious FrontPageMag.com article, because her characterization of US/British sentiments could be applied almost just as well to US/Canada ones:” I took one trip to Britain, in the summer of 1989. George Senior was a-comin’ fer a visit and the hot topic on every BBC show was “Is the special relationship still special?” Now, I knew what this special relationship thing was, but to see the anxiousness displayed on the British media was, well, surprising. Of course, I couldn’t help but note that when a British PM comes to the US, there is no such reciprocal anxiety which might account for a certain resentment on the part of the British towards the overwhelming power imbalance which I did not encounter.”Yeah, that about covers it, except that while the British are (from what I can tell) obsequious (in that formal British backhandedly contemptuous way) toward the US, Canadians are more passive-aggressive. My Canadian readers will recall Prime Minister Martin’s campaign this past summer, which featured the Liberal leader assuring us, in turns, that 1) we wanted so very much foster a close relationship with our good friends the Americans and by God we would under a Liberal government; and that 2) we’re not American, with their privatized health care and their Iraq war and their votes on abortion, okay, we’re Canadian, we’re different, THANK THE LORD GOD WE’RE NOT AMERICAN. Witnessing the US presidential campaigns from my vantage point north of the 49th, I found myself thinking more than once – the Republicans are calling Kerry a flip-flopper? They have no idea. But anyway, similar dynamic – wee Canada sitting up north, chewing its nails and assuring itself that if it behaves properly (and unlike those brutes the Americans, it always behaves properly, it’s Canadian for heaven’s sake!) then the US will love it. Meanwhile, south of the border, the US making its decisions and formulating its views pretty independently of anything Canada thinks. (Independently, that is, when they’re not trying to piss us right off.)”I was reminded of this last night, watching an unintentionally hilarious CBC piece about Machias Seal Island, one of four (!) disputed islands that lie on blurry segments of the Canada/US border. According to the US, the island is part of Maine; Canada maintains that it’s property of New Brunswick. The latter doesn’t sit terribly well with one John Norton of Kennebunkport, Maine*, who leads puffin tours of the island. His family has been in Maine for hundreds of years, apparently, and the last five generations of his family have fought for the US government to take Maine’s property claims more seriously. He defends the island with a righteousness that makes me kind of selfishly glad that the US troops are all tied up in Iraq for the time being. Meanwhile, Canada has had a lighthouse on the island since before Confederation, which seems like a pretty strong case for Canadian ownership; but at the same time, our federal government actively allows its fishermen to fish off the Island coast before the Canadian fishing season has started as long as American fishing season is underway. Cakes and consumption, Canada.”In any event, Norton is adamant: “Eye lead puffin tours of Machias Seal Island, YOU. ESS. AY,” he enunciated from his boat, with all the passion and clarity of a stage actor. He then continued, “Canadians are very smooth they can stick the knife in your back and twist it around” – cue crude arm gesture – “and say

tall dark and mysterious » Character Writ Large, Home And Native Land, I Read The News Today, Oh Boy.

Quick, somebody hand me a violin that only dogs can hear:

Anyone want my old copy of Achtung Baby?

In other words

Home and native land by the dawn’s early light