Tall, Dark, and Mysterious

5/10/2006

How Canadians are made

File under: Home And Native Land, Talking To Strangers, Welcome To The Occupation. Posted by Moebius Stripper at 7:13 pm.

Today I met with a client, who arrived late and frazzled. I didn’t ask him for an explanation, but he offered one anyway, the same explanation he offered me the last time he arrived late and frazzled: “I have a newborn…kid isn’t sleeping through the night.”

This is the same newborn he had when I met him last Christmas.

“Lots of people in the office have new babies,” I remarked idly. “Annie’s little girl must be five months old by now, and Roger just got back from parental leave in March, and Frank’s son was born on Valentine’s Day. And it’s not a large office, either.”

“Well,” said my client, who’d obviously given the matter a fair bit of thought already, “there was no hockey last year.”

16 Comments

  1. A true romantic, your client.

    - ilyka — 5/10/2006 @ 9:34 pm

  2. What’s going on, eh?

    - Mike — 5/10/2006 @ 11:04 pm

  3. Heck, Siobhan ain’t a newborn and she doesn’t sleep through the night.

    And lots of people at my office have been having babies (it’s not just me!), and I’m pretty sure hockey has nothing to do with it. The guys there are more baseball people. But then they’re Orthodox Jews, and I guess there’s a limited range of evening entertainment on Fridays, as TV is right out….

    - meep — 5/11/2006 @ 2:28 am

  4. Some babies will sleep through the night starting when they’re a few months old, but normal babies will cause nighttime interruptions for the next several years. Even once you’ve got them weaned, they have bad dreams or tummyaches, hear “scary” noises (like the furnace coming on at night), need refills on their water bottles or trips to the potty, fall out of their beds and startle themselves, etc. Depending on their personality, some will try to keep you up all night just to see how far they can push the envelope, some will come in one night for a real reason and then come in every night thereafter for no reason until you tell them off, and some will just be light sleepers who wake up every time you try to get up early to take a shower or can’t sleep when you’re watching a movie.

    - Wacky Hermit — 5/11/2006 @ 5:18 am

  5. Yeah, I’d be marginally more amused if I hadn’t heard every sports columnist and commentator say that (a) before the strike (b) after the strike and (c) during the strike.

    It would be interesting to see if there were a season-long surge in births, but I expect the answer is no.

    - wolfa — 5/11/2006 @ 9:53 am

  6. Dammit, wolfa, that’s what I get for not following hockey.

    - Moebius Stripper — 5/11/2006 @ 5:47 pm

  7. So if you had been following hockey, you’d have a kid now?

    - wolfa — 5/11/2006 @ 6:38 pm

  8. It’s long been rumored that births spike nine months after major power blackouts. Alas, there’s no truth to the rumor.

    - Peter — 5/12/2006 @ 8:31 am

  9. Being on the other side of the planet, I didn’t know there was a strike. Now I’m kind of envious. All the sports reporters spending a whole season “reporting” about the national sport not being played sure must have some unintentional entertainment value of the reality-show kind. Can we please, please have a soccer strike?

    - fat midget — 5/14/2006 @ 5:45 am

  10. The plus over a reality show being that the sports reporters would be aware, during the whole season, that they are only the exhibits of a freak show and still be powerless to do anything about it. With a reality show they still hope to get ritch and famous and volunteer as exhibits in exchange for that (imaginary) chance. I guess that’s why all reality shows kick of players in each episode. That way the dismay over having made themselves fools for nothing sets in early enough to be shown on TV. Wow, I’m cruel.

    - fat midget — 5/14/2006 @ 6:20 am

  11. Aren’t you in Vancouver (or BC)? There hasn’t been hockey there in some time, either!

    - IB a Math Teacher — 5/16/2006 @ 5:28 pm

  12. I was amused to note that in today’s Gazette, they quoted a comment from this here blog. They seem to have trolled the internet for blogs about jaywalking in Montreal.

    - wolfa — 5/27/2006 @ 6:17 pm

  13. Yup, Google is the lazy journalist’s friend…

    - meep — 5/28/2006 @ 2:02 am

  14. This is rather a late comment, but how was it that this CBC Edmonton story on exactly the phenomenon you’re describing came out on exactly the same day as your blog post?

    Maybe the public realization of the baby boom phenomenon abruptly reached critical mass? MS, truly you have your finger on the pulse of the nation.

    - saforrest — 5/29/2006 @ 6:16 pm

  15. Gosh, even when I’m MIA for nearly a month (moved into the new place, finally have internet, but some furniture will have to wait), I have influence. Feel the power!

    Wolfa, do you have the article handy? Of all the things to quote…

    - Moebius Stripper — 6/2/2006 @ 5:57 pm

  16. Sorry, the paper is gone. If you want, I can get it and scan it for you, but it’s just a roundup of blog posts (and comments in blog posts, I guess).

    Congratulations on the move.

    - wolfa — 6/4/2006 @ 3:33 pm

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